I Appreciate My Feet!

It’s amazing. Tonight my feet look normal. They are not swollen up like giant marshmallow balls. I hate it when my feet swell up. They get sore, and very sensitive to the touch when they swell up. Do I know what it is exactly that makes my feet swell up? No. Do I have a strong indication of when it is that they swell up? Yes. My feet usually swell up on those lovely days when I do nothing but sit at my table, in my very uncomfortable computer chair, and play on my computer. Now, this is not when I’m at work. I have a comfortable chair at work, and I love it! No, this is when I’m at home. And, yes, there are days when I do nothing but sit on that chair, in front of the computer anxiously awaiting the newest Facebook status update, or hoping that someone’s posted something fun on Twitter, or maybe even to find an exciting new TV show to watch. It’s sad. I know. Tonight, though, my feet are not swollen! I’m super happy. I think that it’s directly related to the fact that I left home at around 8:45 this morning, and didn’t really stop until about 7:15 tonight. Of course, there were bouts of sitting periods, even from 1pm – 5pm I sat most of that time doing some QA work with a new member of our team, however, really, I used my feet. I did some walking, and I didn’t just be completely lazy all day!

This brings me to my theory. I think I take my feet for granted. I always believe that they are going to be there. I trust my feet and ankles to always be available for me when I need to get up and go somewhere. Will they always be there? Well, who knows, right? It’s possible that some day my feet will say, “I’m tired of your lazy arse and I’m not going to work for you anymore.” I’m sure it won’t come out exactly like that, but it could. Me, personally, I take a lot for granted.

Thinking about taking my poor, overworked feet and ankles for granted makes me wonder what else I take for granted. Here’s my list that I’ve got so far:
My parents. – In a way we all do this. If we are close to our parents, we all believe that they’re always going to be there for us! One of my relatives posted on her facebook tonight “I don’t know why I have parents!” Wow. What a terrible thing to say. She was angry because they didn’t like the wind and wouldn’t drive her somewhere to do some shopping. Umm... OK. Nothing like a big ole’ guilt trip to make your parents want to help ya out! Hopefully I’ve never said anything like this to my parents! I love my mother and father, and I’m sure they know that. I respect them, and they respect me. I’m sure they’re not overly thrilled with my decision to return to Korea, but they support me, and that’s what really counts.
My husband. – Derek hasn’t been my husband for too long, but he’s been in my life for over three years now! He’s amazing to me. I have a co-worker who has yet to find that perfect someone in her life. She’s a sweetheart and is trying to find the right guy so badly, and I really hope for her that she does. It’s sweet, really, how involved she gets with the guys she’s dating, while at the same time trying not to be too pushy, and playing the “game” and all of that! I don’t envy her one bit. I’ve often thought about me and my own situation in relation to hers. I guess I was lucky when I met Derek. I was at a point in my life where it didn’t matter. I was getting ready to return to Korea, and meeting him turned my life upside down. But, we were both ready for it. He’d been single for quite sometime, and I was desperate for someone who accepted me as I was, and didn’t try to change me by humiliating me and constantly telling me how inadequate I was. Derek and I only went on like two dates before I forced him to make the big decision about where our relationship was going. We HAD to have that talk, because if I wasn’t going to Korea in a month’s time, I had to let someone know. There were times that I wondered if I was just settling. You know the worst thing you could do for yourself… LOL… But, I think about it and wonder, well, so what if I am? What’s wrong with settling for someone who loves you, no matter what? Is there a problem with being with someone who listens to you ramble on and on about stuff knowing that you’ll change your mind a hundred times before you come to a decision, or someone who gives you a hug when you need it, who makes you laugh when you really want to do nothing more than scream? I don’t think I have a problem with my choice, and I need to appreciate him more.
The Internet! – Yup! That’s right! As I type this, I do not have internet access. It’s driving me nuts! I don’t know how people live without computers and accessing the internet. It’s my lifeline, my way of communicating with my friends, some of my family, and the rest of the world! I am finally ready to purchase the first part of our tickets to Korea, and now, because I have no internet, I’m unable to do so! GRR!
My whole body in general! (Please see above regarding my feet, and apply that lack of appreciation for the rest of my body, really. It’s all so important, and we probably never realize how much we’d miss even a little finger if we didn’t have it!)
My health! I think that’s pretty self-explanatory. Just the other night I was saying to Derek, “I think I should get tested for Diabetes again. I’ve been so thirsty all the time!” Of course, at that time I didn’t make the connection between my constant thirst and the return of Diet Pepsi to my drink repertoire. Hmm... I wonder if there is a connection there. Most likely. It seems almost like I’m so eager to have diabetes, that I’m just working myself to that goal. What kind of goal is that? Obviously not a very good one!
And the following are just a list of a few things that I’m sure we all take for granted without even thinking about it:
Waking up in the morning – We all complain about having to do it, but how rotten would it be if we didn’t?
Hugs & Smiles at those times when you really need them
That one go-to person who’s always there for you when you REALLY need to talk, vent, argue, ask for support
Food. I believe that a lot of us have it much better off than we realize. We do not even know what it’s like for some who have NOTHING, and would not even know what to do in that situation.
A Job! In today’s economy, I’m told a job is hard to find. Is it that it’s hard to find a job, or it’s hard to find a job that you like? I’m not sure. Thankfully, I’ve not really ever had any trouble finding a job, but I cannot even begin to imagine what I would go through if I couldn’t find one. It would probably be devastating.
Freedom
Literacy – Imagine what life would be like if you could not read or write.

Alright, I’ll get off my soap box now. Just remember, if you appreciate someone and you haven’t told them lately, take the time to let them know how much their friendship and love means to you. It’s the time of year to do that, but also make more of an effort to do it all year round! Also, take care of your body. It can be one part of your life where you have some control over. I know that there are times when things are out of our hands, but when it comes to trying to eat healthier and taking better care of yourself, you can do it! I know I’m going to start doing it. Don’t take anything for granted. It can be here today and gone tomorrow in an instant!

Food Choices For the Not So Financially Stable

So, what do you do when you haven't got a lot of money, and you don't can't really afford to buy all the healthy food? Oh, yeah... that's right, you buy the cheap stuff that is usually a lot less healthy. Or, if you have no money, you go through your cupboards and have what's there. It's not always good. Tonight, for supper, we had Hamburger Helper. Of course, it could have been better. If I'd done it right. Me, being the not so great cook that I am, though, did not bother to drain the grease from the hamburger. Yup... that's right. I didn't do it. I never do. It's never usually a problem. Well, tonight, it was a problem. The amount of grease in my supper was disgusting. :( YUCK! I will not buy Hamburger Helper again. Derek's not really a fan of it anyways. OH... and Yeah, I suppose I'll start draining the grease off of my ground beef. That would be smart.

I've been watching the season finale of The Biggest Loser! Some of these people look fantastic! I'm really excited for Shay, and for what Subway's offering her for next May! WOW! Talk about motivation to do a fantastic job! I really cannot believe how terrible Tracy looked. I guess I should have expected it. She's really competitive, and probably wanted to win no matter what. I'm actually really glad that Rebecca won instead of her. Rebecca was super thin, but she did at least look healthier. The top three look really amazing. I must say, I don't really get it, with Amanda. I mean, yeah, she had some weight to lose, but nothing nearly as much as some other people in America. I don't understand why she's in the top 3? I guess maybe people relate to her, because those of us who have a whole lot of weight to lose don't feel like the smaller ones have the same problems as us? I don't know. I can't get over the difference in Danny! WOW!!! He looks years younger, and looks like a completely different person! It's really motivating. I'm super glad he won!!! Whoo hoo! Will I someday experience that? I sure hope so... Maybe once I learn how to drain the grease off my hamburger? LOL

By the way... I have a new blog... if you're interested in checking it out... :

http://jennderektakeonkorea.blogspot.com/

It's going to be a place where Derek and I share information about our time in Korea!

A Letter To Me

Dear Jennifer,

Please stop. Just stop eating. When you are not hungry, there's no need to continue eating. Just because a restaurant has a special of buy one appetizer - get one half price, does not mean you need to buy two, then buy a full meal for both you and Derek, and then buy dessert. Like, seriously? How about, when you know you're full basically after the appetizers... and then you some how manage to eat your burger and fries... how about NOT ordering dessert? Would that be possible? Or... maybe, when you come home, and you're so full you can't move, how about NOT mindlessly eating chocolate chips? Can you do that?

You sit and have conversations with yourself about how you feel gross, about how irritated you are that you can't find clothes to fit you, or that you can't walk for anything more than 5 minutes at a time without feeling tired and worn out, and then how do you help yourself with that? OH, you don't, that's right?

Today, when you got it in your head that you HAD to make peanut butter balls and macaroons, and Derek told you that you didn't really have to, because you'd eat them all and then you'd complain that you ate them all, and you told him that you'd save some for when you went up home the weekend before Christmas, do you really think you were fooling anyone? Really?

Eventually, something's gotta give, Jennifer! You are tired all the time, you are feeling run down, and it's because you are not eating right. You are over-eating all the bad stuff, and are not eating any of the good stuff. Smarten up! Stop wasting all of your time sitting on your arse in front of the computer, get up, and go do something! Let's do something... Just this one week, Jennifer, please keep track of all of the time that is wasted in front of the computer. Before you go to bed, find a notebook to write it all down it, and track your time. You'll probably find LOTS of extra minutes, hours even that could be spent moving, preparing healthy meals, exercising. Let's just see how much time is wasted.

Every day this upcoming week, you're going to come in here and track what you've done, what healthy choices you've made this week, and you are not going to use any excuses for not writing. If you've had a crappy day, so be it. Come and write about it. Share your struggles, and maybe someone will be able to help you. YOU, Jennifer, have created this blog for a reason, and it's about friggin time you started taking control of your life. There is only ONE person in this entire world who can make you feel better, and that is you!

Now, get up off your butt, go get some water that your body is so desperately craving, fold the laundry, get your notebook ready for tomorrow morning, and then go to bed, get some good sleep so that you are ready to kick it up in full gear tomorrow! No more excuses! Just do it!

Love,

Jennifer

And it wasn't even Thanksgiving here...

That didn't stop me from eating WAY too much last night, though. I went to bed feeling ill from overeating. And, now the scales are up 3lbs. I'm not completely worried about those 3lbs. I know weight can fluctuate, but.. damn.... I'm irritated that I can't even seem to control myself.

I need a plan... and I need one NOW!

373

Pretty stressful day at work yesterday led to some stress eating. I bought pop to go with my bulgogi lunch, just because I was very, very irritated with some calls I was monitoring. I was pretty much ready to be done my job right away at that point.

I did receive information on a job that was offering a lot more than the job I've agreed to take. The only thing is, they wanted someone to start Dec 28th. I considered it, very strongly considered it. However, I don't think they want a married teacher. Lots of academies do not want married teachers. They think they have to give them bigger apartments, and that they may not stay if their spouse gets bored or doesn't like it. That's silly. I've spent 6 years in Korea. I'm not about to go there and then just bail because Derek doesn't like it. Derek will like it. How could he not? LOL.

The Biggest Loser Quotes

So, I'm watching the Biggest Loser... and am going to post some quotes here that I wish would sink in to me..

1. "....control of my body."

2. "Obesity is a very expensive disease."

3. "I give 100% all the time to be who I am!"

4. "Unless you feel WORTH the end result, you won't be able to put that into action."

Hmm.. I like #4 the most... What does it take to feel worth it?

374.2

Yup... that's down from yesterday, still not great. I need to drink more water.

So, I talked to my old boss this morning. I tried calling him last night before I went to bed, however, he was not at the hagwon yet, and the receptionist there could hardly speak any English at all. So, I called when I got up. All I need from him is a letter stating that I'd worked there before. He'd rather talk to the school. I'm not sure that that's good, but whatever, I guess.

Here's what I have completed:

1. Degree Reprint is complete.

2. Transcripts are ready to be picked up today.

3. Criminal Background Check is done.

4. Passport should be here soon.

5. Name change is complete on everything.

6. New international friendly bank account is opened.

Now I need the following to complete the process:

1. Get CBC notarized from Korean Consulate.

2. Receive new 2010 contract from my recruiter.

3. Get new passport sized photos taken for the application.

4. Send all of the necessary information to Korea for Visa Issuance Number.

Here's hoping everything goes smoothly from here on out. I'm not sure I trust my old employer to be honest about my work experience there. I was a good employee and I do not believe we left on bad terms. I hope he doesn't screw me over.